Dear Diary
by honeycrispregal
Summary: What happens when Emma finds Regina's diary? Set on the ship-aren't all fics there recently? M rating for the third chapter. Pre-SQ, gonna be a three-shot. CHAPTER 2 UP!
1. Dear Diary

Hey Oncer, Fanfic-er, SWEN member, Evil Regal, whatever you call yourself, you awesome fangirl(or boy, that's cool) person. Quick A/N: This would take place once they got on the boat, before Emma will start using her magic, after they get situated, but before they know their way around the ship and everything. So, hop on the Swan Queen ship 'cuz we 'bout to take a trip down love lane.

It's going to be a three parter by the way, ratings K+, T, then M

* * *

Emma walks down the small, dimly lit hallway. She opens the last door on the right and walks in to the room, shutting the door behind her.

"Shit, definitely not the bathroom." She says as she looks around the cabin. She goes to turn around and go out the door when she notices a small book on the bed. Emma walks over to the pristinely made bed and she picks it up, closely examining the leather bind and old gold edging on the paper. Thinking it's some kind of spell book, Emma opens it to the last open page and starts to read. She was wrong.

* * *

_Dear…Diary, I guess._

_It's Regina Mills here. Jolly Roger passenger, ex-evil queen, adoptive mother, closeted bisexual, ex-mayor-of-a-small-Maine-town-of-my-creation. I go by a lot of things, as you know old friend, the worst, as you might be aware is that Henry still calls me evil from time to time. Right now we are due course for Neverland. It's a long story, so let me sum up what has happened since I last gave you my trust and secrets. The last time I wrote in you, I had just given Emma the poison apple turnover. Because as much as I love her, as much as seeing her every day gives me jitters and butterflies and ignites a spark in me that I haven't felt, well, ever, and I do love Emma , despite the fact that she can be that incessant idiot that her parents are, Henry will always come first, despite my feelings. Well, as it turns out, Henry ate the turnover, sending him into a coma. Emma found out about magic, killed Maleficent (R.I.P. my dear friend), and broke my curse by kissing Henry on the head, their true mother-son love. Is it wrong that I wish she'd kissed me to break it? Stupid idea. It probably wouldn't have worked anyways. So back to the story, Everyone remembered the Enchanted Forest days and long story short, they all hate me, our world still exists, my mother is dead-snow white...Captain Hook came to Storybrooke, trying to kill Rumplestiltskin and get in Emma's pants…I swear to Oz if he had, I don't think I would have been able to contain my feelings. Lets just say that his hand wouldn't have been the only body part he's missing. But the most important thing, overall that's happened, Henry's been kidnapped. He was taken by two bigger idiots than Emma's parents, Greg Mendel, and Tamara whatever-the-fuck-that-bitch's-last-name-is. They took him to Neverland, so that is where we'll follow. Maybe, just maybe I'll get to kill Pan myself, I'm hoping. So now, I have to teach Emma how to do her magic. Not that I'm complaining, any time I spend with Miss Swan I get that feeling. Snow White is hesitant to let me teach her, she's afraid of the type of magic I'll be teaching her. If she only knew that Emma , being the product of her parents' true love-give me a barf bag- is physically incapable of dark magic. Her magic is more pure than the Blue Fairy-again, barf bag anyone?-so she cannot harbor any dark energies. Even if she was capable of dark magic, I wouldn't push her down that, dark, lonely path. Henry would hate me for it and frankly, I'd hate myself quite a bit as well. So, only good light magic for the Savior. Adding, I hope that my desire to teach Emma light magic, pray to Oz, is enough to let me perform it. I'm going to have to return to my earliest stages of learning magic, and my strongest, deepest, emotions to harbor the light magic. If I start thinking like I used to, if I get sucked back into the evil, I won't be able to teach Emma correctly, the way I would teach her, the magic would be distorted and cruel, and impossible to work with. Speaking of distorted and cruel, I tore out my heart again. Don't worry, I put it back in, I just took it out to...check on it. Something happened that I cannot quite explain. I took it out, and it was red. RED. My heart hasn't been red since, well, since Daniel. The cold, blackness was gone. It was warm, red, and I don't know how. Rumplestiltskin and my mother always told me that "nothing can stop the darkness" and that "love is weakness". Blackened hearts can never turn back. I know that, I tried for years to change it back. But now Emma's here and my love for her and Henry has changed it. Frankly, I'm a bit frightened at this. I must go now, it's almost midnight and I'm tired, and in a few days I start teaching Emma magic._

_Wish me luck,_

_Regina Mills_

* * *

"Oh my god." Emma slaps the book down on her lap. _Regina's in love with me. She has feelings for me. And her heart...red? a-an-and little hearts next to my name? I should say something. No, not good at confrontations_. She chuckles at an old, irrelevant memory.

With a smile on her face she sees a pen next to the pillow. Emma picks it up, and starts to write.


	2. Dear Regina

Hey peoples! Here's part two, I realize now that I forgot a disclaimer at the end of that last chapter...so here:

**Disclaimer: If I owned these characters, this show, the words unintentional and swan queen wouldn't ever be in the same sentence, unless the sentence was "****_Unlike Swan Queen, all Swanfire/Swan Thief moments are and forever will be unintentional"_**

**__**Enjoy part 2!

* * *

Regina returns to her cabin, passing Emma on her way. Emma's eyes widen in panic as she scurries by, their arms touching in the tight space as they pass. A tingling sensation envelopes Regina's arm, and unbeknownst to her, Emma's as well. She pushes her way into the room that she doesn't know that Emma just exited, and her eyes go straight to her diary. It's in a different spot, she thinks as she picks it up. Flipping to her most recent entry, she sees small blockish handwriting on the next page, definitely not hers.

* * *

Regina,

Hi...You probably recognize the handwriting from my pretty crappy paperwork, but if you don't, it's Emma. I just want to say that I am so sorry for finding your diary. I found this notebook and I didn't know it was your diary, so I read the last entry, when I realized that it was yours I don't know why I didn't stop reading, but I'm glad I kept on reading. I know I should probably be talking to you face to face, but I thought that this way you couldn't strangle me before you hear me out.  
I'm not really good at the whole feelings thing, my entire life I've kind of been, well, not loved. I've been abused, hated, jailed, beat up, ignored. The only thing I have going for me is Henry…and you. God. Regina- how did I not know? I mean now that I do, I see it, but why me? I'm not saying that's a bad thing, because it's not, it's a rather good thing, but how? What do you see in me? Me? Of all people? I'm sloppy, messy, sarcastic, irresponsible, I'm definitely not the best mother in the world, not to mention I'm really bad at paperwork, unlike you, Miss Perfection. I don't even think we have that much in common. I know you, but not as well as I'd like to, and I know you're confused at what I'm saying right now but to simplify it, I have feelings for you, like real feelings, not just some schoolgirl crush.  
And all of this? It confuses me to hell, because although I feel the same way about you, we can't do this. I mean look at the circumstances here, and not to mention that you're…you. Beautiful, sexy, smart, sarcastic, amazingly just…amazing, you. And then there's me, sporty, messy, hard-to-handle me, and you hate my car, and you hate my leather jacket and you think I'm trying to steal Henry from you, which I'm not, my mother is and the rest of Henry's family is and if I had things the way I wanted them to be it would be you and me and Henry together and god I sound really sappy now. Because I need you, I need you so much Regina, but I can't have you because of your history, our history.  
I'm not blaming you, I would never blame you. I blame Gold. Your mother did things to you because of what Rumpelstiltskin did to her, and he has done some shit to me and let's just say if he wasn't Henry's grandfather…So I blame him for _everything_, except how I feel about you. My feelings are entirely me. Emma Swan. Not-so-closeted bisexual (just nobody's asked me, so I don't really feel the need to tell).  
I never thought I'd be writing you something like this, but I never thought that you felt the same way about me. Hey, don't worry about teaching me magic. I'm really excited to spend some time learning from you in a couple of days. Don't fret about the dark magic, I know you well enough to know that you can control your urges when it comes to that stuff. Before I go, I just want to say again, that I'm sorry for reading your diary, but there is something that you need to know about me Regina. I love you. I'm in love with you too.

-Emma Swan :)

p.s. love is strength, and true love is the most powerful magic of all…but I suppose you already know that, don't you.

* * *

_ Oh, wow I wow. She read my diary...But...She loves me? All this time, she's loved me? What the hell? She doesn't blame me._ Thoughts rush into Regina's mind, and she blacks out for a second, vision blurry, breath quick. She takes a few deep breaths to try to control herself, calm herself. _Why am I having a reaction like this?_ Regina sighs, leaning back against the wall behind her, and smiles. She sits there, smiling for a few minutes.

She laughs,_ there is nothing to worry about._

Regina opens the notebook again and quickly tears out a piece of paper. Grabbing the same pen that Emma used only minutes before, she writes a note on it and gets off of the uncomfortable, hard mattress. Regina fixes her skirt and folds the note into a small neat square. Scribbling Emma's name, and a little heart on the front quickly, she exits the room. She quickly goes up the stairs and makes her way to Emma's room. She knocks on the closed door.

"Yea? Who is it?" She hears from the other side of the door. Regina's brown eyes widen, _shit_, she thinks. "Whoever's there, just come right in, I'm can't really come to the door." This sparks Regina's interest. Curiosity almost gets the best of her, she almost opens the door when she decides to just slip the note under it and walk away quickly.


End file.
